RIO's July E-Zine
Let Randomness Prevail!
CANADA DAY - MAKE YOUR OWN CANADIAN SUPER HERO!
Kim Firmston and MJ Uszy were down at Loft 112 this Canada Day hanging out with some great kids and talking about super heroes, writing, Reality Is Optional, and DramAntics youth theatre camp.
By Mary Innes
Your Unfortune Cookie
You will lose your pet brick in the near future.
You will meet your worst enemy . . .
And it will be in the mirror.
1 533 000
You are going to be eaten by the person on your left.
Lotto 666 666
Word of the day: Death
You will join a political party in the near future.
Tomorrow you will discover that your hair is actually made of spiders. SUBMIT. CONSUME. SURRENDER.
You will meet your worst enemy . . .
And it will be in the mirror.
1 533 000
You are going to be eaten by the person on your left.
Lotto 666 666
Word of the day: Death
You will join a political party in the near future.
Tomorrow you will discover that your hair is actually made of spiders. SUBMIT. CONSUME. SURRENDER.
Random Writing on Dancing in the Persona of a Drunken Person (or Space Pirate)
I love you man! I mean it . . . Sheesus. I love you. I makes my wanna dance. Like on my head man. ON MY FREAKING . . . You don`t even know. Like on my . . . You know. Feet. Yeah . . . Did I say I love you? Cause I do.
- by Kim Firmston
I have no idea what the hell they’re talking about. My dancing is fine. Tch. I can dan. . . dance . . . Fi . . . screw you . . . Bloody ass . . . I CAN DANCE! I . . . *Sob* Man . . . I’m so sorry. *Sob* *Sniff* I didn’t mean to *Sniff* kill your family! I . . . Oh God. . . I’m gunna . . . mmmph . . .
- by Emily Firmston
This dance floor can’t even handle how fly my sprinkler is. I’m about to make this club take off with my fly-ness. Whoo, I’m a jumbo jet of fly-by night, gonna swoop over yo head and you be all, like, “What was that?” And I be like, “You… wuh you know.” Because I be so much bettah than y’all. Woah! I just sounded so hard core. I didn’t even know I could do that. Man, did I ever tell you how much I love you… you’re the best, like, really.
- by Rachel Giesbrecht
Oh my gud, I am just rockin’ this dunce flor. Peple b starin at me lft an right. Som dud phone the 911 people cuz me b brning up did dance flur. Oh my dog, I be killin it. The flor is on fire like my feet and the floor are my feet and they be fire. We r 1 and the same.
- by Teighan Jones
- by Kim Firmston
I have no idea what the hell they’re talking about. My dancing is fine. Tch. I can dan. . . dance . . . Fi . . . screw you . . . Bloody ass . . . I CAN DANCE! I . . . *Sob* Man . . . I’m so sorry. *Sob* *Sniff* I didn’t mean to *Sniff* kill your family! I . . . Oh God. . . I’m gunna . . . mmmph . . .
- by Emily Firmston
This dance floor can’t even handle how fly my sprinkler is. I’m about to make this club take off with my fly-ness. Whoo, I’m a jumbo jet of fly-by night, gonna swoop over yo head and you be all, like, “What was that?” And I be like, “You… wuh you know.” Because I be so much bettah than y’all. Woah! I just sounded so hard core. I didn’t even know I could do that. Man, did I ever tell you how much I love you… you’re the best, like, really.
- by Rachel Giesbrecht
Oh my gud, I am just rockin’ this dunce flor. Peple b starin at me lft an right. Som dud phone the 911 people cuz me b brning up did dance flur. Oh my dog, I be killin it. The flor is on fire like my feet and the floor are my feet and they be fire. We r 1 and the same.
- by Teighan Jones
Ode to My Knee
Knee, dear knee
I give the praise for up holding my thigh
And in turn, my spine
And my body
You bend, only just
Enough
To let me walk and run
And jump
Oh knee, you don’t know how
Much I need you
You and all your roundishness
I guess
Even when you get bruised and
Scraped and cut
You still hold me up.
- Teighan Jones
Oh knee
Thou art so round and shiney
Were it not for you my calf would touch my thigh
With out you, how would I bow
Or kneel
Or play the spoons?
They angle formed with my leg
Is t so beautiful with its scars and dimples
It takes my breath away
And I again
Slowly . . .
Slowly . . .
Slowly . . .
Fall to the ground
Only to stroke your lobe lovingly in peace.
- Rachel
Ode to my knee!
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
I HATE you.
- Ana Malick
Oh knee
You supportith me
Poorly
You creak, and grind,
And crack
You collapse at the least
Little incline
Yet . . . you are there
Yup . . .
You are there.
- Kim Firmston
I give the praise for up holding my thigh
And in turn, my spine
And my body
You bend, only just
Enough
To let me walk and run
And jump
Oh knee, you don’t know how
Much I need you
You and all your roundishness
I guess
Even when you get bruised and
Scraped and cut
You still hold me up.
- Teighan Jones
Oh knee
Thou art so round and shiney
Were it not for you my calf would touch my thigh
With out you, how would I bow
Or kneel
Or play the spoons?
They angle formed with my leg
Is t so beautiful with its scars and dimples
It takes my breath away
And I again
Slowly . . .
Slowly . . .
Slowly . . .
Fall to the ground
Only to stroke your lobe lovingly in peace.
- Rachel
Ode to my knee!
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
Knee . . .
I HATE you.
- Ana Malick
Oh knee
You supportith me
Poorly
You creak, and grind,
And crack
You collapse at the least
Little incline
Yet . . . you are there
Yup . . .
You are there.
- Kim Firmston
RIO Super Heroes
Clockwork Slug
Powers: Runs Clocks, melts flesh, devours humans.
Pros: Is always on time
Cons: Eats the RIO building employees (namely interns).
- by Emily Firsmton
Powers: Runs Clocks, melts flesh, devours humans.
Pros: Is always on time
Cons: Eats the RIO building employees (namely interns).
- by Emily Firsmton
|
Moist Bijorn
“Moist saves all the people.” Can become a puddle of water. If someone steps in him their entire vocabulary is replaced with the word, “moist.” - by Teighan Jones (image by Robin Bowering) |
Steamy Goat Girl
With her goat spritzing powers she warms and moisturizes the goats around the world.
- by Kim Firmston (Image by Dawsynn Meier - maybe???)
With her goat spritzing powers she warms and moisturizes the goats around the world.
- by Kim Firmston (Image by Dawsynn Meier - maybe???)
By Mary Innes