Reality is Optional
Summer E-zine
A time of butterflies and sun rays
A Couple of Scripts
The Cake Shop - Pt 1
Baker: Hi! Welcome to the Cake Shop! What can I get for you?
Coli: What tastes the least like strawberry? My fiancé was worried about cannibalism
Baker: Um... if that's the case, I'd recommend the chocolate. But seeing as you're a... dog, maybe vanilla would be better.
Coli: Rude! How dare you assume my allergies!
Baker: I own a dog, so I just figured that... you know what? Nevermind. What cake would you like?
Coli: The mango boba please.
Baker: Boba? I'm sorry, this is a cake shop, not a boba store. If you want, I can give you directions to the nearest one."
Coli: This is horrible customer service! I very clearly stated that I want your finest strawberry cake!
Baker: I don't get paid enough... Would you like the cake in a large or small?
Coli: Medium
Baker: Okay, listen mutt, if you're here to waste my time I will make you regret it. If you are being serious, I'll make you regret that too. So order a cake before I throw you in the food processor!"
Coli: Vanilla please - small. Thanks... sorry.
Baker: I'll have it ready by tomorrow.
Coli: How about...
Baker: (glares)
Coli: tomorrow. Got it.
Baker: Hi! Welcome to the Cake Shop! What can I get for you?
Coli: What tastes the least like strawberry? My fiancé was worried about cannibalism
Baker: Um... if that's the case, I'd recommend the chocolate. But seeing as you're a... dog, maybe vanilla would be better.
Coli: Rude! How dare you assume my allergies!
Baker: I own a dog, so I just figured that... you know what? Nevermind. What cake would you like?
Coli: The mango boba please.
Baker: Boba? I'm sorry, this is a cake shop, not a boba store. If you want, I can give you directions to the nearest one."
Coli: This is horrible customer service! I very clearly stated that I want your finest strawberry cake!
Baker: I don't get paid enough... Would you like the cake in a large or small?
Coli: Medium
Baker: Okay, listen mutt, if you're here to waste my time I will make you regret it. If you are being serious, I'll make you regret that too. So order a cake before I throw you in the food processor!"
Coli: Vanilla please - small. Thanks... sorry.
Baker: I'll have it ready by tomorrow.
Coli: How about...
Baker: (glares)
Coli: tomorrow. Got it.
Cake Shop pt 2
Baker: Remember that time you said that joke and no one laughted and you though tthey didn't hear you so you said it again and Maisie say, "why did you repeat that, it wasn't funny?
Cleo: At least I don't work somewhere that doesn't have a medium size.
Baker: I'm a nineteen year old criminal working minimum wage in retail, do I look like I care about the cake sizes.
Cleo: Criminal???
Baker: Good likc telling the cops, chihuahua!
Cleo: Chihuahua? What do you take me for, Moose?
Baker: Moose? You're as bad at trash talk as you are at being likeable. In case your smooth brain couldn't tell - I'm insulting you. (gives a condescending grin)
Cleo: Smooth? My brain is so bumpy you wouldn't even believe it!
Baker: That's not healthy, you should see a doctor. And while you're at it, a plastic surgeon too.
Cleo: Idiot! Brains are supposed to be bumpy!
Baker: Not that bumpy. I think you should get that checked out. As well as the bruises I'm about to give you if you don't leave. There's another custiomer behind you.
Cleo: I hope you eat cat food cause you're as bad as one!
Baker: Aww, thanks! I love cats!
Cleo: (storming off) Ugh! Figures.
Baker: See ya, smooth brain! (faces customer) Welcome to the Cake Shop, how can I help you?
Baker: Remember that time you said that joke and no one laughted and you though tthey didn't hear you so you said it again and Maisie say, "why did you repeat that, it wasn't funny?
Cleo: At least I don't work somewhere that doesn't have a medium size.
Baker: I'm a nineteen year old criminal working minimum wage in retail, do I look like I care about the cake sizes.
Cleo: Criminal???
Baker: Good likc telling the cops, chihuahua!
Cleo: Chihuahua? What do you take me for, Moose?
Baker: Moose? You're as bad at trash talk as you are at being likeable. In case your smooth brain couldn't tell - I'm insulting you. (gives a condescending grin)
Cleo: Smooth? My brain is so bumpy you wouldn't even believe it!
Baker: That's not healthy, you should see a doctor. And while you're at it, a plastic surgeon too.
Cleo: Idiot! Brains are supposed to be bumpy!
Baker: Not that bumpy. I think you should get that checked out. As well as the bruises I'm about to give you if you don't leave. There's another custiomer behind you.
Cleo: I hope you eat cat food cause you're as bad as one!
Baker: Aww, thanks! I love cats!
Cleo: (storming off) Ugh! Figures.
Baker: See ya, smooth brain! (faces customer) Welcome to the Cake Shop, how can I help you?
Ninja Poetry by Reality is Optional
This
is
an
ear.
Ears
are
very
well
adapted.
I
like
ears.
They
help
you
hear.
Help.
Sunset, flowers, life as you know it is shrinking.
Falling, like autumn rain.
Glistening rain drops dance like ballerinas.
Strong tides ebb and flow.
A crescendo the diminuendo shrinking with every beat.
Melting like sugar in tea.
The warmth won’t last.
Mom! I hate this food!
It tastes like burnt cat food! Ew
Can’t I have pop-tarts?
That is much more nutritious
Than your icky, gross cooking
Bump, OW!
Whoosh! Bam! Ouch! Cluck! Clatter! Shatter! OWWW!
Trees
have
many
wrinkles
like
people.
Trees
are
also
not
cats
because
they
are
just
more
tree- like.
Very
many
wise
people.
is
an
ear.
Ears
are
very
well
adapted.
I
like
ears.
They
help
you
hear.
Help.
Sunset, flowers, life as you know it is shrinking.
Falling, like autumn rain.
Glistening rain drops dance like ballerinas.
Strong tides ebb and flow.
A crescendo the diminuendo shrinking with every beat.
Melting like sugar in tea.
The warmth won’t last.
Mom! I hate this food!
It tastes like burnt cat food! Ew
Can’t I have pop-tarts?
That is much more nutritious
Than your icky, gross cooking
Bump, OW!
Whoosh! Bam! Ouch! Cluck! Clatter! Shatter! OWWW!
Trees
have
many
wrinkles
like
people.
Trees
are
also
not
cats
because
they
are
just
more
tree- like.
Very
many
wise
people.
Stories/Plotting by the Novelmancers Novel Writing Club
Teacher graded her essay unfairly, She gets angry and wishes on a shooting star to change her grade. Bear appears in her room. They make a deal, she wishes him back, he changes her grade for her. When she breaks into house. They have to hurry before the end of the night otherwise the bear cannot get back home. She biked to her teachers house and crashes and it alerts the neighborhood. They alert the police and now she has to hurry even more. They sneak through the back window and the bear puts teacher to sleep. They have 10 minutes. When she accesses the computer she realizes that this was bad so she decided to wish that the cub could back home and wishes that none of it happened. She revies the same grade, not mad. Decides to study harder next time. Moral of the story, stop the bad before it leads to consequences. THE END.
Berry looked around, startled
"Hello" the tree repeats
The tree Berry is on can speak, it's a magical tree
“Wow, a talking tree!? I’ve never seen one before! What’s your name? I’m Berry)
The tree's name is Acorn
Berry scampers along the trees branches, frantic with excitement
Suddenly, they find a problem.
Berry has lost her favourite walnut, “Oh no!” She exclaimed
The tree decides to help Berry, saying that it can look in the distance for her walnut
Berry thanks the tree over and over again while the tree bends around, searching carefully
"I don't see anything but grass."
Berry and Acorn have no idea what to do
Then, an idea popped into Berry’s mind. There were countless ants on the Acorn’s tree trunk! She could ask the tree to send some of the ants out to retrieve her acorn!
The ants agree to help Berry and start a search group
Berry and Acorn wait in silence, both feeling tense, waiting for the ants to come back with news
The ants come back with a walnut! But it was not Berry's favourite. THE END.
Berry looked around, startled
"Hello" the tree repeats
The tree Berry is on can speak, it's a magical tree
“Wow, a talking tree!? I’ve never seen one before! What’s your name? I’m Berry)
The tree's name is Acorn
Berry scampers along the trees branches, frantic with excitement
Suddenly, they find a problem.
Berry has lost her favourite walnut, “Oh no!” She exclaimed
The tree decides to help Berry, saying that it can look in the distance for her walnut
Berry thanks the tree over and over again while the tree bends around, searching carefully
"I don't see anything but grass."
Berry and Acorn have no idea what to do
Then, an idea popped into Berry’s mind. There were countless ants on the Acorn’s tree trunk! She could ask the tree to send some of the ants out to retrieve her acorn!
The ants agree to help Berry and start a search group
Berry and Acorn wait in silence, both feeling tense, waiting for the ants to come back with news
The ants come back with a walnut! But it was not Berry's favourite. THE END.
Family Road Trip Destinations by Reality is Optional
Summer Reading List
Girls Made of Snow and Glass
Spy School
Heartstopper Graphic Novels (pg-13)
The Memory Thief
All That's Left in the World
Girl in Pieces (Older Teen)
Dance of Thieves Mary E Pearson
Places We've Never Been by Kasie West
Tempests and Slaughter by Tamara Pierce
The Ballad of Snakes and Songbirds by Suzanne Collins
Circe by Madeline Miller
Simon and the Homo-Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertailli
Spy School
Heartstopper Graphic Novels (pg-13)
The Memory Thief
All That's Left in the World
Girl in Pieces (Older Teen)
Dance of Thieves Mary E Pearson
Places We've Never Been by Kasie West
Tempests and Slaughter by Tamara Pierce
The Ballad of Snakes and Songbirds by Suzanne Collins
Circe by Madeline Miller
Simon and the Homo-Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertailli
The Memories of My Lovely Lady
by Inaho Kamoda-Miyoshi
Dribbling juice of a tangy, tongue-twisting citrus, the delighted smile. How she twirled, beautiful as the daisies near her, the fragrance enveloped her. The soft, sweet laundry detergent that lingers around her, always. Sharp red, vivid to anyone’s eyes, scented with jasmine, the iconic lipstick. The woody, the oh-so-fine smell surrounding the house, strong and bold. Powerful, the scent swirls around, clearly obvious of mint, smooth toothpaste. The tartness of the cherry pie she always favored. The wedding cake filled with pumpkin, taming the fierceness of spicy cinnamon with apples. The odd odor of medical tape, bitter, stinging stanches of metal, or was it blood? How I held her hand as she drew her last breath in a foul-smelling hospital room. Tragic, how the church smelled of musky old wood, shame, as she would’ve hated that at her own funeral. She left, as Fate told her to. Memories fade, but not if they're anchored to scents. I will never forget the daisies, or sour citrus, or her eye-catching lipstick. Nor her sad eyes in that nasty-smelling room or the old wood of an old
church.
church.
To Hell I Shall Go by Arya Shetye
Thing of evil, I implore,
'Tis the devil, nothing more.
Perched above my chamber door.
I hear the devil, rapping at the door,
his evil eyes ghastly, more and more.
My soul lies that I have have nothing more,
it murmured back my sins, and stood undaunted nevermore.
My soul shall be lifted, croaking, ungainly, gaunt,
the devil is still ominous to me, nevermore.
'Tis the devil, nothing more.
Perched above my chamber door.
I hear the devil, rapping at the door,
his evil eyes ghastly, more and more.
My soul lies that I have have nothing more,
it murmured back my sins, and stood undaunted nevermore.
My soul shall be lifted, croaking, ungainly, gaunt,
the devil is still ominous to me, nevermore.
Villain by Aarna Saklaan
Rancid smells attacked my nose. The headache inducing smell of bleach and wine, a cordial event for the pesky animals, but nothing other than pure torture for me. My dried-up raisin of a human loves to throw himself lavish parties, and people show up just to see his crude display of wealth. It doesn’t matter to me. I just need to make it to the end of the ballroom where I can escape the horrors of bright red pencil heels, polished gentleman’s shoes, and smug faces.
Little did they know that I could see through their whole façade. The hero that kept their measly town safe—the one that everyone looks up to as the “Greatest man of all time” – was not a human at all. It wasn’t even a man. It was a random female golden retriever sitting in an old man’s home. My human might be wealthy, but these parties are partially funded by the money the government gives the estranged hero. My old man never suspects when a random cheque of money appears on his nightstand. What can I say? The one thing the humans pride in—their intelligence—sometimes doesn’t exist. Still, I do care about them. I mean where would they be without us? Man’s best friend is an understatement.
I padded down to my lab. This was the only place I felt truly comfortable. I unlocked the door with my paw print and DNA—a precautionary step to avoid any humans getting their hands on my technology. I chuckled in my head thinking how they would freak out seeing a dog has created technology 20 years ahead of their own.
Sometimes I wish I got recognized as the creator of their hero, and now my latest project will let me escape into alternate realities so I could very well experience it. I could basically smell their shock as I would reveal myself. My little project was done, after years of working on it. I just needed to input parameters and I could escape into an alternate reality—a piece of machinery that could put AI to shame. I jittered with excitement, my muscles rolling beneath me as I put in the moment where I could bask in the glory of being the mastermind behind the humans’ hero.
The machine came to life, I felt it in every sensory nerve in my body, it made my fur stand up. My tongue lolled to the side—an unvoluntary response to my excitement. A shiver raked through me, in anticipation as I stepped into the metal chambers and hooked myself up to the wire.
Now all I had to do was press the button. Despite my previous hastiness though, I found myself hesitant. There was always a possibility of failure, and I wasn’t ready to see that after the years of work I put into this. Moreover, it might work a little too well…. the harsh truth can be too much to bear sometimes. If this were to go on the market, I would need to appeal to humans—the delicate creatures that they are.
I pressed the big blue button before I could stall anymore. The low whirring of the machines whirred in my ears as the first images flashed before my eyes.
In those next moments I lived a whole lifetime… a lifetime of pain. The dread settles in every atom of my body. The shock, the horror consumes me as in those thirty minutes, I lived through more trauma than thirty lifetimes.
Needles, Medical equipment, pain, wires hooked up to my brain, cutting me apart, killing me, torturing me… all in the name of science.
I knew that the humans would be shocked... but this? How could they be so cruel? How could they take small puppies and try and infuse them with my genetics, how could they use momma dogs as birth giving machines only to snatch their babies and kill them off? And for what? To pick my brain? To understand how a dog can be more advanced than the majority of humans? Where is their so-called humanity?
No. This will not do. They couldn’t just be grateful for the hero they have? This just won’t do.
My body felt sore and bruised as the machine’s whirring stopped. Maybe it was a mistake to add all sensory details, but I’m glad I did. I’m glad I could feel the human’s cruelty before it happened. This was the future? My machine was programmed to include very specific parameters and predict with 99.98% accuracy what was to happen. And given the homo sapiens’ history of violence it makes this scenario even more possible.
Humans have so much pride and protectiveness when it comes to their own, yet they are willing to throw hundreds of puppies’ lives away to try and genetically mutate dogs to become smarter?
I might have sympathized with humans before, but not anymore. I felt resolve steel inside of me. If I would go down anyways, might as well take as much with me as possible.
Humanity has had heroes for long enough.
It’s time they got a villain.
Little did they know that I could see through their whole façade. The hero that kept their measly town safe—the one that everyone looks up to as the “Greatest man of all time” – was not a human at all. It wasn’t even a man. It was a random female golden retriever sitting in an old man’s home. My human might be wealthy, but these parties are partially funded by the money the government gives the estranged hero. My old man never suspects when a random cheque of money appears on his nightstand. What can I say? The one thing the humans pride in—their intelligence—sometimes doesn’t exist. Still, I do care about them. I mean where would they be without us? Man’s best friend is an understatement.
I padded down to my lab. This was the only place I felt truly comfortable. I unlocked the door with my paw print and DNA—a precautionary step to avoid any humans getting their hands on my technology. I chuckled in my head thinking how they would freak out seeing a dog has created technology 20 years ahead of their own.
Sometimes I wish I got recognized as the creator of their hero, and now my latest project will let me escape into alternate realities so I could very well experience it. I could basically smell their shock as I would reveal myself. My little project was done, after years of working on it. I just needed to input parameters and I could escape into an alternate reality—a piece of machinery that could put AI to shame. I jittered with excitement, my muscles rolling beneath me as I put in the moment where I could bask in the glory of being the mastermind behind the humans’ hero.
The machine came to life, I felt it in every sensory nerve in my body, it made my fur stand up. My tongue lolled to the side—an unvoluntary response to my excitement. A shiver raked through me, in anticipation as I stepped into the metal chambers and hooked myself up to the wire.
Now all I had to do was press the button. Despite my previous hastiness though, I found myself hesitant. There was always a possibility of failure, and I wasn’t ready to see that after the years of work I put into this. Moreover, it might work a little too well…. the harsh truth can be too much to bear sometimes. If this were to go on the market, I would need to appeal to humans—the delicate creatures that they are.
I pressed the big blue button before I could stall anymore. The low whirring of the machines whirred in my ears as the first images flashed before my eyes.
In those next moments I lived a whole lifetime… a lifetime of pain. The dread settles in every atom of my body. The shock, the horror consumes me as in those thirty minutes, I lived through more trauma than thirty lifetimes.
Needles, Medical equipment, pain, wires hooked up to my brain, cutting me apart, killing me, torturing me… all in the name of science.
I knew that the humans would be shocked... but this? How could they be so cruel? How could they take small puppies and try and infuse them with my genetics, how could they use momma dogs as birth giving machines only to snatch their babies and kill them off? And for what? To pick my brain? To understand how a dog can be more advanced than the majority of humans? Where is their so-called humanity?
No. This will not do. They couldn’t just be grateful for the hero they have? This just won’t do.
My body felt sore and bruised as the machine’s whirring stopped. Maybe it was a mistake to add all sensory details, but I’m glad I did. I’m glad I could feel the human’s cruelty before it happened. This was the future? My machine was programmed to include very specific parameters and predict with 99.98% accuracy what was to happen. And given the homo sapiens’ history of violence it makes this scenario even more possible.
Humans have so much pride and protectiveness when it comes to their own, yet they are willing to throw hundreds of puppies’ lives away to try and genetically mutate dogs to become smarter?
I might have sympathized with humans before, but not anymore. I felt resolve steel inside of me. If I would go down anyways, might as well take as much with me as possible.
Humanity has had heroes for long enough.
It’s time they got a villain.
Explore ALL That Triple T Travel Has To Offer
(tremendously tragic travels)
Visit Egypt!
You've just stepped off your teleportation platform. Your molecules are still fizzing with the thrill of having travelled back thousands of years. You inhale the refreshing scent of the Nile and you wave to the Pharaoh as he passes by. You are in Ancient Egypt.
Your Journey begins as four strong men with towels about their waists carry you on a litter to your lodging - the Great pyramids of Giza. The tombs are currently empty as the royal family has not yet died. you will be able to admire the hieroglyphics painted on the walls. Later in the day you will be given a papyrus with the translations. If there is a curse drawn on your tomb toom, please don't read it. The curse will be able to follow you back to the 21st century.
For breakfast you will eat the famous Egyptian bread. It is full of sand and will exfolliate your teeth. Lunch will be crocdile burgers. they are considered delicious by the locals. For dinner you will have a feast with the Pharoah. Bring snacks because it will last several hours.
Remember when you smelled the Nile? Well now you get to swim in it! Take a relaxing river float, and then hop on a boat to go for a hippo watching cruse. Get your legs into shape by hiking up the pyramid - not the one you are staying in - a taller one. Then vist the public baths! Now you are all clean for your last activity: mummifying! Yese, you will get to pracice your biology skills on a dead cat! And don't worry, since it's already dead you will Do no Harm.
Visit www.tragictravels/ancient.egypt.rio to book your trip today!
You've just stepped off your teleportation platform. Your molecules are still fizzing with the thrill of having travelled back thousands of years. You inhale the refreshing scent of the Nile and you wave to the Pharaoh as he passes by. You are in Ancient Egypt.
Your Journey begins as four strong men with towels about their waists carry you on a litter to your lodging - the Great pyramids of Giza. The tombs are currently empty as the royal family has not yet died. you will be able to admire the hieroglyphics painted on the walls. Later in the day you will be given a papyrus with the translations. If there is a curse drawn on your tomb toom, please don't read it. The curse will be able to follow you back to the 21st century.
For breakfast you will eat the famous Egyptian bread. It is full of sand and will exfolliate your teeth. Lunch will be crocdile burgers. they are considered delicious by the locals. For dinner you will have a feast with the Pharoah. Bring snacks because it will last several hours.
Remember when you smelled the Nile? Well now you get to swim in it! Take a relaxing river float, and then hop on a boat to go for a hippo watching cruse. Get your legs into shape by hiking up the pyramid - not the one you are staying in - a taller one. Then vist the public baths! Now you are all clean for your last activity: mummifying! Yese, you will get to pracice your biology skills on a dead cat! And don't worry, since it's already dead you will Do no Harm.
Visit www.tragictravels/ancient.egypt.rio to book your trip today!

Steampunk Travel
Welcome to your Steampunk travel destination! As you exit the airship you are greeted by smoggy scents of pollu- ah hem... I mean the WONDERFUL aura of the misty (not smoke I swear) land upon which you descend. Around you, many legged brass creations belch steam as they scuttle to their many destinations. To get exercise, you can escape the giant mechanical spiders, then cool down with a nice, relaxing walk in the park below the clock tower. There are many delicacies to enjoy, including the gruel from Gary's Gourmet Gruel. Enjoy the rocking of your bed foloating 3000 feet in the air from a sketchy and patched steam zepplin. I hopy you enjoy imagining your fuiture paradice vacation in the Steampunk era brought to you by Triple T.
Welcome to your Steampunk travel destination! As you exit the airship you are greeted by smoggy scents of pollu- ah hem... I mean the WONDERFUL aura of the misty (not smoke I swear) land upon which you descend. Around you, many legged brass creations belch steam as they scuttle to their many destinations. To get exercise, you can escape the giant mechanical spiders, then cool down with a nice, relaxing walk in the park below the clock tower. There are many delicacies to enjoy, including the gruel from Gary's Gourmet Gruel. Enjoy the rocking of your bed foloating 3000 feet in the air from a sketchy and patched steam zepplin. I hopy you enjoy imagining your fuiture paradice vacation in the Steampunk era brought to you by Triple T.

Fantastic Fantasy Land
Welcome! This is the fantasy land adventure. If you are wondering about places to stay and things to eat, there are two hotels where you can do just that. The fairy hotel offers glasses on how to fly as well as fun teleportation that can sometimes throw you into space.
Alternatively, you can stay at the Unicorn. There you can ride unicorns all day. Sometimes you can get thrown off, but it only happens 5 out of every 10 times. They also have a movie theatre only showing fantasy genre films and nothing else. Sometimes it becomes a horror movie halfway through, but if that happens, the folks at the Unicorn change it right away.
Welcome! This is the fantasy land adventure. If you are wondering about places to stay and things to eat, there are two hotels where you can do just that. The fairy hotel offers glasses on how to fly as well as fun teleportation that can sometimes throw you into space.
Alternatively, you can stay at the Unicorn. There you can ride unicorns all day. Sometimes you can get thrown off, but it only happens 5 out of every 10 times. They also have a movie theatre only showing fantasy genre films and nothing else. Sometimes it becomes a horror movie halfway through, but if that happens, the folks at the Unicorn change it right away.

It's Canadian, Eh!
Welcome to Canada land! When you get off your moose you will be hit with an intense scent of maple syrup and lakes tat are way too blue. Walk down the path that is surrounded by maple trees and moose. Your cabin should be a sort walk up the road. you will see a small cabin on the edge of the like. Right the bell in your cabin to be greeted by a mass of house keeping beavers.
To eat, there is a Tim Hortons down the road that you walked on originally. you can purchase donuts and coffee. It is included in your stay at the cabin, so just show them the card you find buried in your morning pancake.
Some activities you may do might include:
Welcome to Canada land! When you get off your moose you will be hit with an intense scent of maple syrup and lakes tat are way too blue. Walk down the path that is surrounded by maple trees and moose. Your cabin should be a sort walk up the road. you will see a small cabin on the edge of the like. Right the bell in your cabin to be greeted by a mass of house keeping beavers.
To eat, there is a Tim Hortons down the road that you walked on originally. you can purchase donuts and coffee. It is included in your stay at the cabin, so just show them the card you find buried in your morning pancake.
Some activities you may do might include:
- Swimming in the lake! Our lakes taste of pancakes and butter. WARNING the lake is VERY cold.
- Moose rodeo! Some liability issues may apply so please fill out ALL the paperwork.
- Meet and greet with Justin Bieber! Available only one day a year, so time your trip accordingly if you want to experience this.
It's Time for the Galactic Elections!
WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE PARTY
VS
LET'S PARTY!
VS
LET'S PARTY!
What Am I Doing With My Life Party
Platform:
Slogan - MAKE MY UNSUCCESSFUL CAREER GREAT AGAIN!
Platform:
- No jail time for anything
- Free housing in a cardboard box for those who need it.
- Leagilize child labour
- Cucumber skin eaters will be put to death
- Make everything free
- Illegal to go outside
- My Little Pony must be watched for at least 2 hours a day
- Competitive cheese rolling will be the national sport
- National food: other people
- The Possum is the new national animal
- The flag will be replaced with our faces on it!
Slogan - MAKE MY UNSUCCESSFUL CAREER GREAT AGAIN!
The Let's Party!
Platform:
Slogan - Everyday is a party!
Platform:
- Everyday is a holiday
- We will even party on Pluto, swim on Saturn, and in the hot springs of Yellowstone National Park!
- Free food Fridays
- Gift trucks will patrol and fire gifts out of a t-shirt cannon
- Everyone will be paid in gifts
- Packaging and other garbage will be eaten by nanobot decomposters which will turn the rubbish to soil.
- Everyone will get free pets
- Every summer we will flood the downtowns of cities and have a month long pool party!
- Go to school to learn how to party
- Free tacos on taco Tuesday and Thursday
- Free sundaes on Sundae Sundays
- Presents are the new currency
Slogan - Everyday is a party!